Sex is the only thing that makes me feel better. Athletes like these dudes are generally low risk. As I shower I realize this news is the wake-up call I've needed, the way I've been behaving I'd soon be getting a rep as bad as Lindsay Lohan's. I make a vow to change, and soon I'm rehearsing my acceptance speech, imagining myself on stage in a glamorous new dress, looking the star that I am. I'm walking down the "Red Carpet" at the annual Adult Entertainment Industry Awards, and fans, both guys and girls, are screaming out to me. I'm with Jack, and as much as I love him I feel bad. It should be Rolf whose arm I'm on. The continual calling out of my name along with the glare from the non-stop flash of paparazzi cameras is disorientating.